Yesterday, I slept deeper and longer than I had in many months. I twisted and turned, and slept till there was no iota of sleep left in my eyes. Right here in the city of Ibadan, away from home, in the living room of my barrister friend, a three-bedroom flat, you’d think the three-seater sofa will impede my sleep. But there, in that simplicity, the sleep flourished.
I had read through and listened to all the International Men’s Day messages I got, and it got to me. Especially the ones that came from people who weren’t my everyday companions.
“…all the words of wisdom that you dish out daily on your statuses, on Facebook, your experiences that you share to uplift others. I see them all. I celebrate you greatly.”
“One of the amazing men in my corner. Thank you for all you are and all that you do.”
“…Lekan, na man you be”
I read them, over and over again. And I felt them. It got to me. I took a pause. I took a deep breath. And I was done.
“I’ve tried”, I said. “And tonight I take a break”.
It felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders. I knew I will pick it up the next day. I knew I don’t have many things figured out. It was the first time in a while that I slept with no expectations of getting up at a certain time. Neither an alarm nor a reminder was set. It was the perfect setting for me, away from my life’s responsibilities, regrets, clients, expectations, and constant fear of failure.
It was the International Men’s day, and I slept peacefully.
And I am grateful to everyone who took the time to celebrate me as a man.
Being a man is not an easy task, for anyone of us, but we wear the hat notwithstanding, joyfully and with sacred dedication.
I am the ImisiOluwa.