I heartily welcome you to PILLOW TALK WITH FLOURISH. Thank you for your cooperation, support, and commitment. I appreciate the love and I love you too. Let us dive into today’s musing.
Say this sentence seven times as fast as you can: a nurturer is a natural blend of nature and nurture nurturing the nurtured to become nurturers. How did that go? (Laughs)…
Nurturers are no other persons but our parents (and the parentals in our lives). Being a parent is not an easy thing. Our parents did not just come together to convey us to this world. They are responsible for the genes that we carry. They also put in so much effort to provide an environment suitable for our growth and development. Can you remember the nature and nurture theories? (That’s not for today, though).
The spotlight is on our parents today. Big greetings to every parent! Thank you for being there always.
(Please, note that these are purely musings and not another set of rules).
I will share some things (from observation and experience) that may help us in our relationship with them. First of all, they want to know that they are loved and appreciated. We must not forget that! They might appear to be machos but deep down, they want to know that you love them. So, how can we make this happen always?
Let me share this short story. As a child with disciplinarians as parents, I felt that I could not please them. However, I remember that I sought to make them happy. And eureka! I began to learn and apply what I discovered around the age of eight. I wouldn’t know how it happened but I just knew what they wanted (but, sometimes, the child in me would still not do so). I discovered that mum loves acts of service. Helping in doing things around the house before being told will make mum feel loved (bàjébàjé). About dad’s, it is a complex mix (laughing out loud). He enjoys quality time especially when you sit with him to listen to God’s word, though.
Why that story? It is because knowing their (primary) love languages and communicating your love to them in that manner will do much good. In fact, it will allow you to have peace. It is not too late if you haven’t discovered their love languages. You can start now! You will begin to see wonderful sides than you have ever known.
Here is another point. Listen to their stories- the stories of how they fled during a crisis, how they overcame some spiritual battles, how they lost someone or something, childhood tales, etc. Listen attentively. Even on those occasions when they repeat such stories, smile as they narrate them and say some lines to let them know that you are following (and that you remember the story too). This makes them happy.
Many times, they want to relive their youthfulness through us. We could indulge them, you know. Laugh at their jokes. Even as you laugh, let them know that you respect them. Take pictures with them and save on their phone. Take selfies and send to them on WhatsApp (whatsup, wazzap or whichever way they love to pronounce it). Give them gifts too! Nothing is too small- monthly subscription, recharge cards, their favourite fruits and so on. Remember their birthdays and wedding anniversaries too.
My last thought is that you should pray for them! We cannot overemphasize the place of prayer. Pray for safety, provision, guidance, good health, and many others for them. You will love them more and they will love you more. God answers prayers.
Let them know that you love them deeply as much as you can. Truth is, by the time they leave the world’s stage, all we will have left of them will be memories and legacies. Let us love them in every way we can. We know they are not perfect humans, neither are we. There is perfect beauty even in our imperfections. Let us love them and love them more! (Raise your hands if you are becoming a nurturer this decade…)
Thank you for musing with me yet again. I hope to hear from you. Your comments and contributions are highly welcome. You can send me a direct message or leave a response here. We will meet again next week by God’s grace.
PS: I sincerely pray for those who have lost a parent or parent figure that you are comforted. You have the strength to achieve all that they would have loved to see you achieve and even more in Jesus’ name.